The Importance of Money Conversations Among Freelancers

Life as a freelancer can be lonely business. Even if you are introvert, like me, this is a problem, because you don’t have anyone to bounce ideas off of, to compare tactics with, and to talk about money. If it weren’t for my fellow freelancers, business owners, and entrepreneurs that have opened up to me about how much they charge, what they’re making, and their rules for accepting / rejecting work, I’d still be begging for scraps.

The Problem: We’re All Too Polite to Ask about Money

Perhaps you were raised in a household where food and clothing just magically appeared, and no one bothered to tell you about the money that purchased everything. Or maybe you’ve spent so long in a corporate gig that you’ve been conditioned to keep quiet about your salary and benefits. You may also have been taught that it’s simply not polite to ask anyone about money. 

Well, I have all three of those problems. My parents never discussed money, never told us how to save, budget and plan, and we didn’t have an allowance to even learn by trial-and-error. My professional experience was largely one of secret negotiations and rumours about what so-and-so made last year. 

I was completely duped in my corporate career when it came to money, naively believing what I was told and expecting that my performance would drive my pay. I’ll cut to the chase here–it didn’t. I took what I was offered, like a good little employee, and went on my merry way to work my ass off for another year. Later I found out just how much less I was making than my counterparts, and how little experience, performance, and value had to do with what someone was paid. 

But for me, it was all too little, too late. I only realized how underpaid I was after I left my 9-to-5 job and started to open up with people about what they make, what their experience level was, and what the industry standard dictated. Now, I’m in a position, as a freelancer, to start asking for what I’m worth and choosing to work for and with people that respect what I bring to the table.

There’s only one way to do that: start talking shop with your freelancing colleagues.

The Solution: Find Your Circle of Business Besties

If it weren’t for a handful of people that have stepped forward to help me and that I’ve cultivated relationships with, I’d be driving blind on this journey. Of course you can figure everything out on your own, but honestly, who has time for that? Not me.

I’d rather learn from people that have done this thing and worked out the kinks, so that I don’t have to make 17 mistakes before finally getting it right. When I’m struggling and feel like nothing goes my way, I have a group of friends to ask if this has happened to them too, and more often than not, it has. Sometimes all you need to hear is that you aren’t alone, no one’s perfect, and here’s the solution for next time.

Finding your business besties allows you to have frank conversations surrounding money. We’re all in business to make money, so why is it still taboo to talk about it? We need to release this story that it’s unprofessional to discuss with others and we have to start being open and honest about what we make, how much we charge, and the inconsistent income that is a feature of freelancing. 

My favourite conversations are those held in our writers group and on the podcast, where I can really get into the weeds. I can’t tell you how helpful and refreshing it is to hear someone five years ahead of me tell me that sure, she’s had fantastic $40k months but then made $0 the next two. Or how insightful it is to know that my journalist friend’s minimum to accept an assignment is $250. 

I was reminded of how invaluable these conversations were yesterday at a Starbucks when my friends, who are both writers, stopped me mid-sentence to correct how much I should be charging for a service. They reminded me of all the auxiliary costs associated with a project, and to account for multiple rounds of edits, problems with software, and having to work on something for a quick turnaround. As it turned out, my pricing was off by a factor of two. I would have charged $500 for something that should be $1000. 

Where To Find Your Circle of Support

You’d be surprised how easily and quickly you can connect with like-minded individuals online. Find your jam, in terms of a social network or blog, and start to leave comments with meaningful questions or reach out to someone in your industry via DM. I’ve built quite a few relationships with women over Instagram DMs, and then taken them offline to email and in-person. 

The second way you can build your network is to join local groups, such as the writers group I was a part of. There are groups and meet-ups for everything–podcasters, artists, young engineers, consultants, etc. Do a quick Google search and find a chapter near you to join, or find an online community to be a part of, whether it’s course, a Facebook group, or a blog. 

Then, you need to spend some time developing relationships with people that are on a similar path as you are, so that you can mutually support one another. Most people don’t mind being asked questions about what they do and what they’d recommend. Others have programs to help guide you, and if you have the means, it’s an excellent way to get the advice you need. 

Worst case scenario, you ask someone for a coffee chat or to answer a question and they say they don’t have time. You don’t have anything to lose, so start reaching out and start asking questions about money. You deserve to be making more of it and to get there faster.